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Navigating Embarrassing Sex Situations

Navigating Embarrassing Sex Situations

Everybody has had at least one in their sexual lives. Whether it was gross or humorous, panic-inducing or easily taken in stride, we’ve all done something in the heat of the moment that causes a complete sense of embarrassment. However, it is how you dealt with it that determines whether the situation was a dealbreaker or not.

Easily the most common type of sexual embarrassment are the surprise bodily emissions. We’re talkin’ belches, farts, menstrual blood, vomit, urine, poop and whatever else might happen to come out of the human body. Now, there might be a sliding scale here, and the depth of a relationship might come into play as well in determining how embarrassed you might be with any of these.

The early days

People who are just hooking up or starting a relationship are likely ultra-sensitive to any of these, even a little burp. You’re in the all-about-impressions phase of the relationship and want to ensure everything goes perfectly. On the other hand, a lot of people in long-term relationships are well into the let’s-just-be-comfortable stage that allows the free-flow of gas of all sorts, no worry about periods and at least one person holding the other’s head over the toilet after a night of hard drinking.

And that’s the thing—all of these are completely natural happenings. Most people do most of these things on the regular and it really is no big deal. Getting freaked out because your partner belches during oral sex or forgets to flush the toilet after dropping the kids at the pool is a waste of time. Nobody should feel embarrassed when their body functions. The best solution? Laugh it off or just shrug your shoulders. Seriously, this stuff don’t matter at all.

Laugh or cry?

There are, however, other instances that have less to do with biology that could make you cringe at yourself and are a little harder to reason away. A prime example is calling your partner by someone else’s name during sex. This unfortunate happening can spoil a mood faster than any of the above will. And despite the fact that you didn’t mean to do it (we hope!), crying out an exes name at the height of your passion could put a serious dent in your sex, your relationship and your partner’s ego. However, at this time, make it about your partner to discuss their feelings about what happened. Jealousy and insecurity could come into play and it will be helpful to both of you if you can assure your partner of your feelings and desire for them.

Another source of supposed embarrassment could come if you cannot perform sexually. If he can’t get it up or she isn’t getting wet. We’re slipping back to biology here, but these instances shouldn’t be considered embarrassing at all. These things happen and if you’re really concerned, plan to discuss the situation with a doctor. So many people are shamed into thinking that not being sexually available is some kind of fault of yours. It definitely is not.

Sexual embarrassment really is just what you make of it. And hopefully, neither you nor your partner will make anything of it at all.

About Jon Pressick
Jon Pressick

Jon Pressick is the sex community's international gadabout and Cherry Banana's writer in residence. An award-winning sex writer and blogger, Jon is the editor of the critically-acclaimed Best Sex Writing of the Year, Volume 1. He is a frequent contributor to Cherry Banana with a range of sex-related content and his writing has appeared in numerous magazines and books, as well as all across the Internet. Jon is also a co-host and producer of the long-running sex radio show Sex City. You can keep up with his many sex-related articles here at Cherry Banana or at his own blog, Sex in Words.

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